Every person has a distinct way of thinking about and dealing with money. And in a relationship, those distinctions can be the difference between being on the same page about money issues and having it be a constant source of conflict. After all isn’t there a money component to just about every decision we make as a couple? That’s why when couples ask us how they can stop fighting about money, we encourage them to take our assessment, developed by a statistical scientist, and figure out their Money Personalities.
Each person has two of The 5 Money Personalities™, a Primary and a Secondary. How the two impact each other and how either one or both impact your spouse is very interesting and powerful.
There is no right and no wrong Money Personality™! There are strengths and weaknesses to each of them. If you haven’t yet, take The Money Personalities Assessment™ to make sure you know both of yours. Then hand the mouse to your spouse and encourage them to do the same.
You may discover, you’re a Saver.
- Get a genuine rush from saving money. It’s a source of pride to get something you wanted for less.
- Are organized, responsible, and trustworthy when it comes to money. A Saver won’t tap out the kids’ college fund to pay for a new boat.
- Rarely spend impulsively. Savers will scour the Internet for deals, plan every detail of a vacation, and make sure they have the money in hand before making a purchase.
- Avoid credit card debt like head lice. Savers hate paying interest and accruing debt. They want to pay off every bill, in full, right away.
Of course each money personality also has its challenges.
If you’re a Saver, you need to be aware that you can be:
- A joy stealer. If you’re a Saver and your partner isn’t, your resistance to spending money can take the fun out of everything from seeing a movie to going on vacation.
- Overly focused on financial goals. Often, the reason Savers are joy stealers is that they tend to only think about the money. It’s great to have firm financial goals and to work hard to meet them, but sometimes Savers need to swallow their anxiety and let themselves – and others – just enjoy life.
- Obsessive about money. Savers love to talk about money, think about money, and worry about money. The money obsession can also get so annoying to the Saver’s partner that he no longer wants to be part of financial conversations.
- Cheap. Most Savers have a hard time parting with their money, so much so that they come across as cheap and even selfish to other people.
Savers can be great partners because they are careful about spending and usually spend wisely. The challenge is for them to see money as a means to an end, not an end in itself.
Make It Happen!
Scott and Bethany Palmer
The Money Couple
Money Huddle Tip: If one of you is a Saver, take some time to talk about the impact this Money Personality has on your relationship. What are the strengths the Saver brings? What are some of the challenges?
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