This Is A Test

February 09, 2013 12:36 am

How thrilled would you be if someone handed you a check for $2500—for something you would be honored to do for free?

This happened to a friend of ours recently. He’s a college professor and was asked to share his insight as a keynote speaker on a topic he loves. The university called him on his way home to tell him he’d been selected from a pool of candidates to speak at this well-attended, scholarly event. Cal was so thrilled he immediately started making plans in his head, and almost didn’t hear them add “and you’ll receive an honorarium of $2500.”  

Blocks from home, he couldn’t wait to tell his wife. Finally, all those years of tireless research were paying off! He tossed his keys on the table and hollered for his wife, “Honey, they’ve offered me $2500 to speak at that big event I was telling you about. $2500!! Let’s take a trip somewhere fun!”

Cal’s Money Personality is Flyer/Risk Taker. The nameplate on his office door at the university should read: Invest in relationships and keep it interesting!

Cal’s wife is a Saver/Security Seeker. She hollered down from their bedroom, “What?! I thought we agreed we weren’t going anywhere this year. What about all our debt? I thought we were paying that down, not going on trips!”

Cal told us how disrespected and unappreciated he felt. It seemed as if his wife had heard that giddy tone from him before, so she didn’t even really listen to what he said. She thought, “Here we go again” and impulsively responded with her fear about spending money.

People often marry their money opposite, but it’s not a terrible thing. In new relationships, we’re attracted to the way they shower us with gifts, or make the future seem so secure with their intentional savings. But truly, marrying our money opposite can be a HUGE asset, adding critical balance to each person’s spending habits. Cal’s wife did a fantastic job over the years, making a professor’s meager salary skillfully cover the entire family’s expenses, while Cal’s Money Personality urged them to create fabulous memories they both now treasure.

How could they have changed this new memory from trash to treasure?
Leave us your comments.

Make it Happen!
Scott & Bethany Palmer
The Money Couple®
Creators of The 5 Money Personalities™

3 Responses to This Is A Test

1. Saver says:

   “Honey, you are so fabulous and smart!!!  I’m so glad they finally appreciate you!  And thank you SO much for wanting to spend this money on a vacation for us so we can have fun together!  I’m so grateful!  I know we’re in debt, but this is your money, and you earned it,  And it’s a gift from God, not something you were not expecting. We should just receive it in the same spirit and with the same grace in which it was given.  So, where do you want to go????”

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   • themoneycouple says:

     @Saver Great response Saver! There is nothing quite as edifying to our spouses than talking to them in the language of their Money Personality.

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2. foreverway says:

   special responses require special communications…there is wisdom in the ol’ saying, “seeing things eye to eye”.(never holler, go touch and talk face to face, eye to eye) do you think her response might have been different had he gone upstairs to tell her? (hmmm…mirror neuroning)…if you want to keep your relationship like when it was new, you have to ‘remember to forget’ being so familiar…remember to treat each other with a respect for individuality, or in other words, forget that you know each other and think like you have just started dating, (because it is true, you really dont know each others thoughts…does anyone, really?)…to have special communications you must…’remember to forget’ no matter how long you’ve been together…you must be loving and unasuming…(guys…she is not a guy and visa versa or don’t place any expectations on another, it is just plain rude), a holler to your best buddy on the same subject may get you a favorable response, a spousal relationship has a much deeper committment and is requiring then of more forthought regarding communications, yes, it’s required if you expect your spouse to be commited, (you decide if it is work or play…you decide)…there is wisdom in the ol’ saying, ‘you don’t want to skip the foreplay’…last words of advise…forgiveness…and… easy to say and hard to do but then again maybe it is not…have faith, just keep up!

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