Date Ideas to Keep the Romance in Your Marriage
The pressures of life and work create a challenging environment for romance in marriage, don’t they? Making time for date nights is hard. We get it. Let us help you put the spark back into your romance.
Think back to when you first fell in love with one another. You couldn’t wait to spend time together—long walks in the park, movies, dinner, coffee—it didn’t really matter what you did, you just wanted to BE together. These experiences contributed to why you fell in love, and they are worth continuing, no matter how long you are together.
Not long ago, we were stunned by a conversation with a recently divorced gentleman. He said he and his now ex-wife hadn’t dated in years. Seriously?! What would have happened in their marriage if they had kept dating?
We know that keeping date night alive in our relationship is absolutely crucial to a close intimate relationship. Romance in marriage shouldn’t stop the moment you tie the knot, or even decades later. What, then makes people give up on exploring captivating date ideas in favor of vegetating in front of the TV?
The Excuses Used to Avoid Date Night
So, date nights aren’t happening nearly as often as they should. That’s right – the more couples we ask the more excuses we hear. We know, we know when you hear date night you think googly eyes and a romantic dinner. Question? Is that what date night is about? Are they crucial to keeping the romance alive in marriage? After all the “I do” has already been said, right?
We will go out on a limb and say – if you don’t make date nights happen and make a conscious effort to spark romance, you won’t have a marriage for long. That’s right – one of you will get bored and one will want to walk away.
After all, a romance is built and strengthened by spending time together and date nights are one of the ways to secure it.
One lady told us…we don’t have that kind of time. Our response – you will have a whole lot of time if you aren’t married!!!
We don’t claim to be the relationship know-it-alls. Is our relationship perfect? No way – but date night has been a “non-negotiable” for us. And we didn’t know why others didn’t see the massive positive impact that we experienced. So we decided to study it.
So after chatting with lots of couples – The no-date-night excuses fell into 3 common categories. Can you see yourself in any of them? If so – read on and get some “turn it around” tips to get your Date Nights on track.
Excuse # 1: I See This Person Everyday…
Of course, you see this person each and every day. At least we hope so. But when you are in the routine of life, the discussion usually ends up being all talk about scheduling and kids. Date night gives you the opportunity to connect on fun subjects and create experiences for you to talk about other than the boring schedule and what the kids are up to. Get out of the house, get out of the routine, get out of the same ole, same ole, and discover why you wanted to marry your honey in the first place.
TIP: Start slow – once a month but make it predictable and dependable – like every 1st Friday of the month.
Excuse # 2: I Am Way Too Tired…
UHHHH…. We all know how super busy weeks wear you out. You are just too darn tired to do anything. Listen up guys and gals, even if you feel super duper tired and really don’t feel like going out or doing anything, DO IT ANYWAY! There is something about dressing up a little, putting on some nice perfume or cologne, and getting out of the rut. You will be amazed at how your “second wind” will kick in.
TIP: Don’t schedule date nights on days you know you will be tired. Saturday nights work well for us because we aren’t tired from our exhausting weekdays. For some, it may be a different night each week. Get your calendar out and schedule your next Date Night at the end of your next one. This will keep you on track.
Excuse # 3: We Don’t Have Time…
Time is something we don’t feel like we have a lot of these days. When you have work or kid care scheduled throughout the day and then you are busy at night with kids sports, school, or church activities – WOW – it gets to be too much. Here is where you have to decide priorities. Maybe you need to get off that one board you are on or say no to a commitment. Make your relationship top priority.
TIP: Go on a walk together and decide if there is too much on your plate. If so, then decide what you are going to say “NO” to in order to be more available for each other. There you have it – 3 excuses and 3 tips to get over ‘em. We came across this article that listed some fun date night ideas to get your juices flowing.
Got any other “no date night excuses” you’ve heard and how to tackle ‘em? We would love to hear them. Be sure to email us at [email protected]. Once you actually say these reasons out loud, you may well realize that there’s no insurmountable obstacle to having regular romantic evenings. If you’ve gotten out of the habit, you can try these dating tips to reignite this aspect of your marriage.
Date Ideas to Keep Date Nights Fun and Romantic
1. Take Turns Planning Your Dates
This way each person can be satisfied, even if your Money Personalities and interests don’t always overlap. For example, the Security Seeker can choose a predictable date idea one week, and the Flyer can pick something spur of the moment the next. Or the Spender could pick something lavish one week and the Saver could choose a cheaper picnic the next. Be sure to be supportive of each other’s ideas; it’s a great way to keep the romance alive.
2. Be Creative & Fun
Life is busy and sometimes we forget to add the “spice” into our relationship. Don’t do the same old boring dates. Instead, add something new and different into the mix to surprise each other. Take a drive to somewhere you have never gone before. Go to that new restaurant you have been wanting to try. Find a local concert that seems enticing. Have fun!
3. Prepare a “Date in the Bag”
Here’s a fun date idea for the Spender and Saver Money Personalities. One person surprises the other with a brown paper bag (or colored if you like) filled with gift cards for a date. A movie, a favorite restaurant, or maybe just dessert. The bottom line is it keeps the Saver happy and on budget and the Spender gets to use a gift card and spend. Enjoy!
BONUS: Go out on a double date. One way to keep the sparks flying in your relationship is to go on a date with another couple. It helps you have a context to really appreciate who you fell in love with.
We can’t leave you without saying … You know those Money Personalities we mentioned above? Be sure to understand how they work in your relationship by taking our FREE 5 Money Personalities Assessment! You won’t be sorry that you did.
How do you add sizzle and fireworks to your romance? Please share a story or two in the comments.
HAPPY DATING!
Taylor and Megan Kovar
The Money Couple
0 Comments